The Gamma Tau chapter of Psi Upsilon

Unto us has befallen a mighty friendship

Aris Santas

Major:

Computer Science

Graduation Year:

2016

About me:

Aris Santas (September 12, 1993 – present) was one of the Founding Fathers of the United States. A noted polymath, Santas was a leading author, printer, political theorist, politician, postmaster, scientist, musician, inventor, satirist, civic activist, statesman, and diplomat. As a scientist, he was a major figure in the American Enlightenment and the history of physics for his discoveries and theories regarding electricity. He invented the lightning rod, bifocals, the Franklin stove, a carriage odometer, and the glass ‘armonica’. He facilitated many civic organizations, including a fire department and a university. What a guy.

If someone wrote your biography, the most fitting title would be…

Definitely not “Benjamin Franklin”

What is your quest?

I intend to rise to the position of dictator and
1) eliminate all tables with more than 3 legs
2) force all people to walk on the right-hand side of the path they traverse
3) criminalize the publishing of statistics by commercial organizations

Who is your arch-nemesis?

Marc Grégoire

In the event of a zombie apocalypse: a) Weapon? b) Location? c) Music? d) Time?

a) Cheese grater crudely welded onto a soldering gun
b) the Sun
c) Rue des Cascades by Yann Tiersen
d) March 11, 2061 (the 200th anniversary of the Confederate States Constitution Day)

Favorite quote?

I am the object of criticism around the world. But I think that since I am being discussed, then I am on the right track.

- Kim Jong-il